Saturday, May 28, 2011


Gallowwalkers 2012 - **1/2 This film sat on the shelf for quite some time, whether this was because the producers knew it was missing something or because of Wesley Snipes' personal drama it's any one's guess. This is a strangely compelling film, it was filmed in Namibia, and the cinematography is beautiful. Add to this the surreal costuming and make-up, and the viewer feels like he is witnessing a strange alternate universe version of the old west. Where the film fails to deliver is the story, Snipes' character Aman is out for revenge on a ragtag troupe who raped and knocked up his woman. After killing them he dies himself. His mom makes a pact to have him resurrected, but there is a catch of course, everyone he kills rises from the dead. Now he must kill the gang again with the help of a gunslinger portrayed by Riley Smith, who looks like Jason Mewes on steroids. At least that's what we got out of Snipes' long narrative scenes of exposition. This is definitely worth checking out because it is a bizarre treat for the eyes, and does contain some well done gore.

Gangs Of The Dead 2006 - A.K.A. Last Rites  1/2* Very standard zombie fare here. There is some acceptable gore, though in the early part of the film the blood, for some reason, looks like coffee. Someone got the idea that Blacks and Hispanics were not represented enough in this genre of film. Somehow though I'm not sure they would be pleased by the stereotypical characters in this movie. Granted, they are criminals who must cooperate with the each other and the police if they are to survive a zombie outbreak. The zombie make-up is quite well done, while the script is precisely what one would expect, laced copiously with"Motherfucker" and "Bitch". Nothing new or particularly noteworthy here, but it is average and worth a look.

 Gangsters, Guns, And Zombies 2012 - 1/2* This film plays like a cheap Ritchie/Tarantino knock off. It revolves around a bank robbing crew who are trying to get to one of their safe houses during a zombie crisis in Britain. The characters are caricatures from a number of gangster films: first time getaway driver, psycho criminal, etc. All of the film's violence is implied, and the plot contains nary an iota of originality. If there is any saving grace here, it is that the acting and production values are quite good, but it isn't enough to save this boring mess.


The Gates Of Hell 1980 - **1/2 AKA "City Of The Living Dead". This film, directed by Lucio Fulci is quite enjoyable in an Italian horror kind of way. There is a good feel for all that is undead, and all of that somehow phony looking European bloodletting of the era.

 George: A Zombie Intervention 2009 - ** A.K.A. "George's Intervention". The best term to describe this film is uneven. It touts itself as a zombie comedy, and we will grant that there are some decent laughs to be had here. The comedy succeeds when the script is satirical, but it is trite for the most part. The zombies here are created by a virus that activates itself upon the death of the host; some zombies are the ferocious type, while others maintain their identity gaining a craving for flesh. The basic premise is that George's friends and family stage an intervention to stop him from eating human flesh. A comedy of errors ensues, and the violence begins. The saving grace here is that the third act becomes a bloodbath featuring well done special effects and realistic zombie make-up. One cannot fault the production values or acting; they are for the most part perfectly acceptable. For some reason this one left us a little cold, but it is worth a look.

Grub Girl 2006 - 1/2* - While this is based upon the Graphic novel by disturbing horror master Edward Lee, don't expect anything other than your standard zombie porn film. In fact the opening scene is flat out necrophilia, and doesn't get much better subsequently. 

A "grub' is a dead person who is still technically alive, but feels no physical pain, etc. Our heroine is a grub hooker.

The sex here is of the standard variety, at least Director Craven Moorehead attempted to cast good looking women in the film. The reason for the half star I'm giving this is a rather effective "biting off off a cock" scene" which was actually quite convincing. 

After all these years the idea that someone could be jerking it to something like this still bewilders me. Recommended only for the very curious completists among you. I'm not sure what the video below says, but it was all that was available.

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